Forgive

Who Can You Count On?

Trust is a natural part of life. We can trust people we haven’t even met — like doctors, teachers, lawyers, and pilots. We must assume that these folks have gone through the educational mill and came out the other side primed and pumped to do a great job. The problem is these ‘professionals’ are human beings and they make mistakes — just like us. How do we handle these problems caused by the people we trusted? We counted on them to help us and they hurt us instead!

We must trust people; even total strangers. What else can we do? We can’t totally give up on humanity because we’re a part of it. If we can’t learn to trust people, we’re going to be a cluster of nervous wrecks and basket cases. We can’t drive anywhere or eat anything unless we can trust that other drivers will stay on their side of the road and the people cooking our food aren’t sadistic sickos. I’ve heard stories and seen on a movie where a police officer asks a guy in the back of a burger joint if he spit on his sandwich. Who can you count on? Who can you trust?

You might have heard it said, “Trust is the first to leave and the last to return.” I used to hear that a lot in group therapy when someone talked about how they hurt their loved ones and how their family and friends treated them as a result. It’s difficult, I admit, to count on someone after they’ve betrayed you. Jesus tells us to ‘forgive others so we can be forgiven.’

For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
— Matthew 6:14-15

We know, deep down, that we can make a difference, influencing through love and grace, others’ lives for the best. But we must first accept what is happening around us and respond to the call of God on our lives so we can ‘be the change we want to see in the world.’ One part is rightfully assessing the actual problem(s) while the other part is being the best person we can be: the person God made us to be.

Forgiveness is the key to reconciliation, but what about the people who haven’t hurt you? Do you count on anybody? Or do you count their sins against you?

Image from Pixabay.com Derks24

Image from Pixabay.com Derks24

We need to come up higher than counting a person’s sins against us and living with a tally sheet. We know others do that to us, but we must seek to be the light and not perpetuate the darkness. Keeping score keeps us from reaching others for Jesus.

For others to be able to count on us, we have to get rid of the score keeping and accept the call to be DIFFERENT from those stuck in the ways of the world. People may ask, “Do you think you’re better than me?” while our answer is, “No. I just think different than you.”

Who do you trust on the level of ‘You know they’ll be there for you any day/anywhere’? Is it a spouse, a friend or a sibling you know you can go to when the chips are down? Who do you turn to when the crap hits the fan? This is usually when we realize who our true friends are. Think about it. Who has been there for you through your journey to defeat depression?

People will fail us. We have failed others. Some people will even fail us in our time of greatest need because they were never reliable. We must take responsibility for the shortcomings of others as we understand the world is full of unreliable people. We must seek to improve our understanding of others and be more attentive to the little things they do that tip off their true feelings toward us, not being overly suspicious, but just being more aware.

I’m reminded of a few lyrics from an AC/DC song, Dog Eat Dog

Businessman, when you make a deal
Do you know who you can trust?
Do you sign your life away?
Do you write your name in dust?
— AC/DC (Ronald Belford Scott / Angus Young / Malcolm Young) c/o LyricFind

I can’t tell you how many times those lyrics have reverberated in my mind over the years as people have come and gone in and out of my life — for good and bad reasons. People I thought I could trust have hurt me and people I knew not to trust hurt me, too. We’ve all had our hearts broken and had people do us dirty, but here we are still going down the road of life!

Photo by JOHN TOWNER on Unsplash

Photo by JOHN TOWNER on Unsplash

No matter what has happened in my life, I’ve seen God intervene at all the exactly right moments — times from when I fell asleep at the wheel and slammed into a telephone pole to multiple drug overdoses to the current daily teachings on Facebook. He’s always made Himself available to me and I never knew why. I’d told Him to ‘get lost’ more times than I could possibly remember and He kept coming back. I can definitely count on Him and so can you.

One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
— King Solomon (Proverbs 18:24)

When I talk about God, I think about how He has been with me and saw me through everything in my life. Everything. All the ups and all the downs. Knowing this, I still get angry and confused at times with the way He goes about seeing me through things. We all want things to be peachy keen and all rainbows and unicorns. Many Christians foolishly believed at one time that, with God, all things were not just possible, but everything was going to be great and swell and hunky-dorey. What fairy tale did that come from?

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.
— King Solomon (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Conclusion

Can others count on you? Are you the kind of person you’d call first when the chips are down? Are you trustworthy? Your life starts with you.


Prayer

Father God in Heaven, I come to You now. You have been there for me more times than I can count. Thank You so very much! I am in need of breakthrough and You are the first Person I thought of when it comes to ‘people I can count on.’ I know I can count on You because You have displayed the desire and fire to help me get out of every rut I have fallen into or put myself in. Again, thank You! I have been struggling with trust issues, Lord, and I ask that You would help me get my life straight so i can be trustworthy and graceful just as I need others to do for me. I know ‘I reap what I sow,’ so I ask that You would forgive me for the times I have failed others — and You. Please help me live the right way and be honorable and trustworthy so others can, and will, count on me the way I can count on You. You ask us to help others get to know You and I admit I haven’t always done a good job of that. I know Your desire is for me to be like Jesus, so I ask that You would make a way where there was no way. Show me the people I must forgive and help me to forgive them so I can reconcile with them and have fewer and fewer triggers as time goes by. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.


Banner photo by Stellrweb on Unsplash