For those who know me well, they know I like to say, "Out of the well of the heart the mouth speaks."
Jesus says, in Luke 6:45, "A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of."
So, take a step back and ask yourself, "What's in my heart?"
Depression resides in a person's heart and mind; what we call the soul. When we read the word "heart" in the Bible, it means the soul. The 'well of the soul' is where we keep our innermost thoughts, opinions, and emotions -- our personality. Have you heard of 'personality flaws'?
'Personality flaws' are the things we do out of our soul wounds. Sometimes we call these soul wounds "baggage". When people have hurt us with words, deeds, or both, we become emotionally wounded. If we do not confront their actions as Jesus describes in Matthew 18, seeking to reconcile the damaged relationship in love, we remain wounded. Conversely, for the times when you have harmed others, you will have to apologize to those you have offended. Believe me, apologizing may not seem like fun, but when you do it, regardless of how the offended person/people respond, you will have done the will of God and His forgiveness comes into your heart for your part of the conflict. This is a way to get healing for your soul wounds and eliminate the 'personality flaws'.
Never under estimate your need to make an apology. One day in prayer, as I was asking God to help me deal with some profound anxiety, He commanded me to call and apologize to an ex-girlfriend. I immediately responded with anger and bitterness. Yelling at Him as I pounded the floor, I clarified how she was the one who broke my heart and if it wasn't for what she said, I'd have been fine. Nevermind how my reaction proved my need for healing, I loved her very much and was still very angry (wounded) for what she said to me twenty-some years ago. I explained to God how she should be the one reaching out to me. He did not relent. I explained how I had no way of getting a hold of her. He told me to ask a friend for how to contact her. I obeyed (obedience is a key to the Kingdom) and my friend not only had contact info, but a photo! [When God wants you to do something, He will remove all obstacles!] Well, as I had no more arguments, I prayed (very important) then called a couple of numbers that led me to her cell phone. She called me back and I simply apologized. I wanted to say some other things, but Holy Spirit guided the conversation. Her response was something I could not have foreseen -- gracious, loving, and kind. I expected a tough conversation with some rough words, but here, God was working on her heart as he was working on mine. I was being healed with every single spoken word out of my mouth and hers. Simply talking things out as adults seems to be a lost art in society today. After we hung up the phone, my feelings toward her flipped from anger and bitterness to peace and contentment.
The healing that came into two hearts that day would never been possible if I had not obeyed God's promptings. As a child of God, you will be called on to provide such moments, too.
Furthermore, I'm sure you have discovered that time does not 'heal all wounds' ... only forgiveness through the Blood of Jesus frees us from the power of the kingdom of darkness. Pray and reach out and make amends to someone today and allow God to work through you to bring the healing you both need.
What's in your heart? Bitterness, fear, and thoughts of vengeance OR love, joy, and peace?
God bless you!
Prayer
Lord God Almighty, thank you for being so patient and merciful toward me. You could have just condemned me for my many sins, but here I am coming to You today because You are long suffering toward me. I ask that You would bring to mind the times when I hurt others so you can make amends with them. Help me to be merciful and gracious to others as You are to me. Lead me by Your Holy Spirit day in and day out. I know I have great value inside me and I choose today to let Your goodness flow into and through me to bless others. May my life glorify You. In Jesus' name, amen.